He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
