super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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