I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
