I want to walk on stilts...naked
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
