No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize