i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
