fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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