I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize