im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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