My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
