thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
My cat gives me a boner
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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