they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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