Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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