I wanna bring you to show and tell
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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