Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
