kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
