you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
