She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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