have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
