I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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