My hair reeks of homosexuality.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Even my vagina gasped.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
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