we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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