I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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