2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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