never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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