she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
