So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
