There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
