If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
