I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
