Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
