im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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