I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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