I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
