I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I think I just shit out all my problems.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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