Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
