i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
