She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
