he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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