3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
