you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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