11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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