how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Randomize
