I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
