and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
