This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
