i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
