dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
