so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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