so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Randomize
