Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
