I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize